from the Korean Army to being published

the blog of an "ex-patriot" writer in Korea

Random #74: News for the New Year

with 5 comments

It’s a new year, and while I don’t like attaching special meaning to the passing of time, I do have some news. Not good news. Just news, plain and simple. The first item is that I’ve decided to abandon the agent search and to self-publish. I realize that I still haven’t reached a level in the quality of my writing that I’m satisfied with and don’t think that I’ll be able to get there by being stubborn and completely re-writing the manuscript for the third time. I’m tired of working on it. In three weeks, it will be the ninth anniversary of my discharge and eleventh anniversary of my induction and almost ten years since I started typing up the earliest notes for this book, and I think that’s enough. The book is what it will be, and I’m fine with that. I really want to focus on my novels, and hopefully focusing on something I actually want to write will help me to grow as a writer.

The second item is related to the first. I will be quitting this blog sometime this year. I won’t shut it down, but once the book is e-published, I will only update it if there are any developments with the publishing, something I’m not really expecting. This blog was started for generating interest in this book, and I feel like it has recently strayed from its original purpose.

My name is not Holden Beck. I chose this ridiculous pseudonym to hint to the readers that I was “holding back” certain things in the book (at least I intended to at the beginning). Not that I was trying to hide any embarrassing stories or to stifle my emotions. Holding back one’s emotions is not conducive to writing and any lack of emotion in the book is only due to a flaw in my own character. I originally meant to withhold information related to my estranged father, primarily because he asked me not to publish this book so as not to damage his reputation. Even using my real name would cause him to lose face because there are people around him who know that his second son was forced into the Korean Army. I do leave out some of the things that happened between me and my father during that period but only because it has no bearing on the story being told. A lot of my experiences have been cut from the latest draft for the sake of readability. There are still times I worry how interesting a read it is because those two years were supremely boring years.

Anyway, the publishing is still a way off. I just finished another round of edits and hope to finish it in the next coming months. I still have to design a cover and figure out exactly how to self-publish. Hopefully, the announcement of the publishing of the book online won’t be too far off, but I’ve broken too many self-imposed deadlines to make any declarations. I will update again once I make some progress.


Written by Young

January 10, 2015 at 9:57 pm

5 Responses

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  1. “Even using my real name would cause him to lose face because there are people around him who know that his second son was forced into the Korean Army.”

    Really don’t get this. Why would he lose face? Feel free to answer via email if you can’t answer this publicly.

    NB: I think my previous comment went into your hungry spam filter. This has been happening with every WordPress blog on which I’ve tried to comment using my WordPress account, thereby forcing me to switch to Twitter. Not sure what it is about WordPress, but it seems better to comment as a non-WordPress user. Weird.

    Kevin Kim (@bighominid)

    January 11, 2015 at 2:45 am

    • It’s actually pretty complicated and has a lot to do with his perception of what others think about him. I don’t think it would be hard for people around him to realize that I’m his son, and the parts in the book about him not being around wouldn’t be a good reflection on him as a father.


      January 12, 2015 at 9:33 am

  2. Young hyung. If you are interested in self-publishing through Amazon, send me an email. Ann’s old manager works in that department. I don’t know anything about self-publishing and don’t know if Amazon is a good company to go through, but I’m sure if you want, Ann can connect you guys.


    January 16, 2015 at 3:21 am

    • That’s right. I forgot that Ann was working at Amazon. I’m getting some feedback on the book right now and will probably decide what to do next month. I’ll probably go through Amazon. I’ll let you know when I figure things out. Thanks. Hope you’re doing well.


      January 16, 2015 at 9:18 am

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