from the Korean Army to being published

the blog of an "ex-patriot" writer in Korea

Random #47: Time Is Ticking

with 2 comments

 Saturday was my birthday. 33 years old. Or my Jesus age, as Annie put it. Jesus was 33 years old when he came out of the desert, started preaching and getting followers, got tried as a revolutionary, died for the sins of all humanity, and came back from the dead. I’ve got a lot of shit to do.

Birthdays aren’t a special occasion for me anymore. I was drinking on Friday at the jazz bar with Hole and at 11:55, he and the bartenders said, “Five more minutes,” and I thought, five more minutes for what?

Saturday night, I had a very small group of friends out for Hooters and Club I. Jayuin, my waiter, had two bottles of J&B on the table waiting for us. God bless the guy. The alcohol and “water” was constant and by the end of the night, I was falling asleep, drunk and tired of partying. I remember the beginning and the end of the night but the middle was a blur. It’s how I like the reminders of my mortality—unmemorable. At the end of the night, a crazy girl that had been talking to Mark braved the freezing cold to find us having breakfast at Burger King and she wanted to share my bed but I sent her away. She wasn’t the right kind of crazy.

Last week, I was thinking about re-working the book from yet another different approach but decided against it. This is it. This is going to be the year I finish the manuscript and see if I can sell it. If I can’t find an agent and publisher, I’ll try to self-publish it via electronic media and then I’m going to move on to the other stories that are wasting away on the backburner. I’ve been working on this book for too long. It’s already been almost six years since I finished my military service and my memory’s not getting any better.

I’m hoping that I’ll be motivated now that time is ticking. I still hold to the thought that 35 is it. If things go according to my beliefs, I have two years left to live. I’m either going to die in a couple years or live forever. If my premonition is right, I want to see my name in print at least once before I go.

* In other news, Kim Jong-il, the crazy-haired, plump dictator of North Korea, died on my birthday. I guess it’s good news but we’ll have to see the effect his death has on security and the exchange rate.

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Written by Young

December 19, 2011 at 10:14 pm

2 Responses

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  1. Well… according to tradition, Jesus was 30 when he started his career as an itinerant preacher, and he was crucified at 33. Since it’s not even clear whether Jesus existed (there’s a small but vocal corner in the scholarly community that notes the evidence for Jesus comes almost entirely from scripture written decades after his supposed crucifixion; we have no hair, no bones, and no other direct evidence that he lived), the 30/33 marks are probably more symbolic than accurate.

    I used to joke about having an “I Outlived Jesus” party once I was 34 (to have the party at 33 would mean to celebrate living at least as long as Jesus). Good luck as you buckle down and grind this ms out by the end of 2012. At least now, you don’t have to worry about Kim Jong-il foiling your plans to complete your book.

    Kevin Kim

    December 20, 2011 at 2:25 am

    • Ha. Thanks for the clarification. I guess I can have an “I Outlived Jesus” party next year, with the assumption that Jesus was a real person and didn’t fake his death and run away to France or that he didn’t come again as a Korean man to found the World Mission Society Church of God. (Have you ever heard of this? Really crazy shit. There’s a huge church building in my neighborhood and they’re nuts.)

      Completing the book is the one goal for this next year. If I do live until 35, one year to finish the book and one year to enjoy its success with alcohol and women or one year to mourn the meaninglessness of my existence.

      holdenbeck

      December 20, 2011 at 6:58 pm


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